Art source: Eldersexual logo, all rights reserved.
✖ Two men at sunset, photo sent by a friend who thinks it was in a collection of old Paris photos; we're tracking it down.
✖ Not pregnant, Thomas Beatie, the pregnant man, by Mary Ellen Mark.
✖ Physical side of a song, public art, Rio de Janero by Os.
Version 1.0 | Update 5Sep11 | Needs lots more informative links; help us out. | Written by Paul Quin
Love. Physical intimacy. Sex.If you want to be romantic right now, take a pill.
If you want to be romantic tomorrow, pay attention today.
Sunsets can be beautiful.✖ As we get older, physical affection becomes rarer. Sexual appetite may fade (but not disappear). The gentle arts become more important. Cultivate your gentle side, learn new techniques of intimacy to please your partner.
✖ The first rule: Be respectful. The second: Have fun! Being grown-up about sexual + romantic relationships doesn't have to feel like work. Remember, you're in this with your partner. It's a new kind of pleasure, giving rich rewards without unpleasant surprises.
✖ Arousal is 80% imagination. Pay attention to your idea of sexy. Your 'perfect' images might need updating – if you're caught up in the Swimsuit Issue or Go-Go Boys, or if your last imagination re-load was after the Homecoming Dance in 1973, that could limit satisfaction.
✖ Makers of erectile dysfunction drugs pepper us with ads on the importance of the traditional sexual act. Truth is, the hard-item-in-soft-place routine may not always be worth the side-effects of sex drugs. If you take e.d. pills, be sure to keep perspective. It is never all about the hard one. Be safe, be considerate, be prepared to go to sleep frustrated.
Losing control can't be good.✖ Pay attention to the one you're with. Talk, words and gestures. Listen. Sex is a conversation, not a contest.
✖ When you have drunk a little too much, or taken drugs, or gotten tired. When you're in unfamiliar or uncomfortable circumstances. You might prefer to stop and wait for another time. Regret doesn't help make happy memories.
✖ When anyone, any time says, No! It means, Stop now. Retain whatever dignity and affection you have left. And when you feel uncomfortable with where some personal interaction is headed, speak up. Don't wait until you're heartbroken.
We don't get pregnant.✖ But we do need to minimize risk. When I have sex with someone, I connect to everyone that person has ever had sex with. Might pick up new techniques – but just as easily an STD, including HIV, or liver disease or crabs. Think before you act.
✖ There's still a reason for condoms. When we were young, it was all about birth control; now the condom, along with spermicidal gel, is about thwarting other sorts of undesired transmissions.
✖ Don't fool yourself with a Clinton. You know when you're having sex, so be a grown-up. Take responsibility, take the pleasure, share it out.
The physical side of love is life-affirming.✖ So is a smile, a kind word, a song. Engage yourself in all of life, sex tends to follow.
✖ Feeling invisible? Just 'cause we're no longer hot, young things doesn't mean we aren't vibrant and sexy. Try to compete in the world of 20-somethings and you wind up being a cash resource. Time to set our own context. Broaden your imagination, feel who you are now, sexy and alive. If kids on the street ignore you, talk to the dogs, smile at the flowers, wave to the trolley driver. Overflow with joy and the world will come along, at least the part of the world you want on your side.